Do You Have Novemberitis: Causes, Symptoms & Treatments

Are you feeling burned out? Distracted? Bored? Are you nodding off at your desk even after a full night of restful sleep? Are you becoming annoyed with your coworkers or overreacting to minor offenses? Can you predict every twist and turn in the tiresome plotlines of workplace gossip? Do you feel like taking a long coffee break and—this time– just not coming back?

If you can answer yes to any of these questions, you may be suffering from Novemberitis.

What is Novemberitis?

Novemberitis is an acute condition that targets the soul. This seasonal malady spikes during the fall, like a gust of cool wind that shakes the last leaves from the branches of a lonely tree, and involves a rotation of focus from outside to inside, which can be painful. During the spring and summer, green grass, flowers, weddings, vacations, and butterflies keep us energized and motivated at the office. But when these distractions disappear and the long year starts to inch its way toward the holidays, Novemberitis can force otherwise cheerful, committed employees to feel an impending sense of doom, lethargy and paralysis every morning when the alarm goes off.

Treating Novemberitis

The good news: Novemberitis is not terminal. In fact, it’s not even a real disease. If left untreated, Novemberitis will cause absolutely no further medical complications, and symptoms will not worsen. Untreated Novemberitis can (and probably will) give way to holiday warmth followed by springtime giddiness. Novemberitis does not require surgery. But for those who suffer from acute Novemberitis, immediate help is available.

Introducing Nujobia

Nujobia (pronounced ‘New Job’) is an FDA approved treatment for those who suffer from November-induced ennui, hopelessness, and frustration. Nujobia, when taken daily, can actually cause patients to adjust their reality, not just their perception of reality. Instead of masking the experience of a bleak, repetitive and pointless existence, Nujobia can allow patients to change their existence altogether…permanently.

Is Nujobia Right for You?

Nujobia IS right for you. There’s no need to consult a doctor. Nujobia is perfect for employees of every age and background, and it produces no side effects of any kind. It’s safe, effective, and can be discontinued at any time.

You don’t need a prescription to benefit from Nujobia. You only need a polished resume, a brilliant cover letter, and a winning interview. Once you begin your course of treatment, you can put Novemberitis behind you for good, achieve your goals, and start living the life that’s meant for you.
–Nujobia! Because you deserve better.

11 August 2020

Looking for your next role?
Looking for Tech Talent?

Of course you are. That’s why you’re here, right?

Nobody leaves the family….